Divorce mediation is a different way of handling the divorce process and is an alternative for divorcing couples to familiarize themselves with. Divorcing couples should understand the potential advantages of divorce mediation and how to prepare for the divorce mediation process.

Potential advantages of divorce mediation

The following are some advantages of mediation

• Saves time and money: mediation means avoiding the formal divorce process which can be more costly and time consuming. Compared to litigating a divorce, mediating it can be a more efficient process for the divorcing couple.
• The process is fair to everyone: mediation involves a third-party neutral who helps the divorcing couple resolve their divorce-related concerns. As an objective party, the mediator may be able to help the divorcing couple reach solutions they may not have otherwise considered.
• The process is more private: mediation is not a public process and does not create a public record. For that reason, it can be more private which can be easier on the divorcing couple and any children from the marriage.

How to prepare for divorce mediation

To prepare for divorce mediation, the divorcing couple should:

Child Protective Services in Texas is tasked with a big responsibility: keeping children safe. That’s why they’re required to investigate all allegations of abuse and neglect without much regard to the truthfulness of the initial claims. This can jeopardize your family integrity, which is why you need to be careful in how you interact with CPS and its employees. If you’re not, then your children could be taken from your care, which could have major implications for both your short- and long-term rights as a parent, as well as any outstanding custody cases you might have with your children’s other parent.

Things to consider when coming into contact with CPS

To successfully navigate your involvement with CPS, you need to keep a few things in mind. Let’s look at a few of them:

• Your statements will be used against you: CPS cases oftentimes become child welfare cases where the State may try to present evidence against you in hopes of keeping a child out of your care and/or ensuring that the State can intervene in your life to provide you with certain services. Therefore, when interacting with CPS workers or law enforcement, try to keep your temperament in check and don’t be so quick to provide information. We know that coming into contact with the child welfare system can be stressful and nerve-wracking, but you don’t want to cause any self-inflicted harm to your family or your rights as a parent.
• Know your rights: You have a lot of protections when it comes to involvement with CPS. For example, you children can’t be removed from your care without a court order or the assistance of law enforcement. Therefore, a CPS worker, on his or her own, can’t remove your children from your care. Also, CPS workers might ask you to provide a lot of information or even submit to a drug screen. During the investigation phase, you’re under no obligation to provide that information or submit to a drug screen. CPS also can’t interview your children without your consent or a court order. It’s helpful to be as cooperative as possible during these investigations, but, again, you don’t want to cause any avoidable harm to your family’s integrity.
• You don’t have to navigate the process alone: The CPS and child welfare systems can seem confusing and stacked against you as a parent. The good news is that you don’t have to face the process alone. Instead, you can choose to obtain the assistance of an attorney who understands this area of the law and how to navigate with your parental rights in mind. This attorney can not only advocate for your best interests, but he or she can also serve as a buffer to a certain extent between you and CPS, which can make things a lot easier on your end.
• CPS involvement can affect your custody case: Although CPS assessments and child welfare cases are separate from your divorce or paternity case, they can have major implications on pending custody matters. Therefore, you need to be cautious in your dealings with CPS and keep in mind the bigger picture of how your words and actions can affect your relationship with your child even after the State is out of your life.

Have experience on your side

Dealing with CPS and the juvenile courts is unlike any other part of the law. That’s why it’s helpful to have someone on your side who is experienced in navigating the system and can assist you in getting past whatever allegations you may be facing. One of these attorneys can help you not only work with CPS and the court as needed, but they can also help build the defense that you may end up needing to protect your rights as a parent and your children’s best interests.

When couples are preparing to divorce, each spouse may wonder how marital assets such as retirement funds will be divided. The way assets are split between the two spouses will depend on the type of retirement account the former couple has and the regulations associated with the account(s). It's important to know that not all retirement accounts are alike. If you live in Texas, here are some important things to know about receiving assets once your marriage is over.

Defined contributions

Defined contributions are retirement plans in which an employee contributes a set amount. The employer will likely match the employee's contributions to a certain amount. A 401(k) plan is the most common type of defined contribution account. A worker has a specific amount of their paycheck deducted and set aside into a retirement account. The employer matches the contribution to a certain point. The deduction for this account is pre-tax, which means the money comes from the worker's gross pay before taxes are taken out. Once the employee retires, the money is taxed when received. Account-holders are always aware of what is in their retirement account and what the funds are worth. If the account holder is involved in a divorce, the money from the retirement account generally must be split between the account holder and their former spouse.

IRAs

For an IRA, the funds are given to each party by way of a transfer after the divorce is final. For instance, if the account contains $200,000, the spouse who is not the retirement account holder will receive a portion of the funds transferred into a new IRA. The funds will not be taxed if they are transferred to an account that similar to the original one.

Filing for divorce in Texas is a challenging time for parents and their children. While you're trying to navigate through the divorce process, your child might have trouble concentrating on their schoolwork. How can you keep their grades from slipping when you have so much on your plate?

Tips on keeping your child focused on school

During the divorce process, school is one of the few things that give your child a sense of normalcy. Make sure you focus on your child's education just as much as you did before you filed for divorce. While it's easy to focus on other things, you should set expectations for your child and encourage them to keep up with their schoolwork. If you're not paying attention to them, they might give up on their grades altogether.

If possible, you should communicate with your former spouse to make sure that you have a consistent set of rules in both households. If you make your child do their homework but your former spouse doesn't, your child will probably start thinking that education isn't important. They might even want to spend more time with their other parent because they're the "fun" parent. You and your former spouse should set up a consistent schedule for your child to complete their homework and participate in after-school activities.

Texas is a community property state, which means that all joint assets are generally divided on a 50/50 basis in a final divorce settlement. However, it is obvious that you won't literally get half of the family car after your marriage officially comes to an end. Let's take a look at the various ways that ownership of this asset may be determined.

Is there positive equity in the vehicle?

If there is positive equity in a family car, truck or van, a judge may order you to sell it. The proceeds from the sale would then be split equally between yourself and your former spouse. Alternatively, you may be able to take ownership of the vehicle by paying them what they would receive if the car were sold.

You could trade the car for another asset

Let's say that your former partner has an attachment to a vehicle that you have an ownership interest in. It may be possible to waive your right to that asset for something that you want more such as your favorite recliner, an art collection, or full ownership of a brokerage account.

While a divorce can be a contentious affair, you can choose to end your marriage amicably. Instead of asking a Texas judge to craft a settlement, you and your spouse may be able to come to terms on who gets the house, custody of the pets or control of a joint bank account outside of court.

Do you communicate well with your spouse?

If you communicate well with your spouse, you may be able to agree to an amicable divorce settlement by engaging in informal talks. In some cases, you may be able to come to an agreement without the assistance of a mediator or other outside parties. However, you may want to consider working with a professional as he or she may be able to make sure that the talks remain cordial and focused on settling the divorce in a timely manner.

Compromise is key

As a general rule, the best settlements are the ones in which neither side gets everything that he or she wants. Ideally, you'll focus on obtaining what you need to maintain a reasonable lifestyle after the marriage ends. It can be easier to get what you need by giving your spouse what he or she needs to survive on his or her own. For example, you may be able to keep the marital home in exchange for letting your spouse have a sports memorabilia collection.

Couples divorcing in Texas must divide a lot of their assets, and it can be a headache to deal with. However, the most important and often most difficult task is the division of parental responsibilities. In this part of the divorce, you're likely to go through a long process of deciding how co-parenting will work and if the other parent is even suitable to take care of children. Fortunately, many couples do find some sort of agreement, but that is not the end of the process. The following includes a few tips on co-parenting after a divorce.

Work as a team

Remember, they may be your former spouse, but they are still your children's father/mother. Positive and effective communication should remain in order to provide your child with the best life possible. Some items that require good communication include:

• Educational choices
• Medical decisions
• Travel restrictions
• Show empathy toward your children

You may not think that your children are old enough to understand the seriousness of divorce, but they do. Even if they do not understand what divorce is, they do understand that their routine has changed, and they no longer see mom and dad together. That is why it is so important to show empathy toward them and allow them to tell you how they feel and what they are worried about.

The holiday season can be a stressful time for Texas parents who have recently divorced. Fortunately, there are steps that you can take to ensure that you and your former partner do what it takes to provide an enjoyable experience for your children.

Be prepared to compromise

There is a good chance that you might not be able to spend both Thanksgiving Day and Christmas morning with your child. Therefore, it may be a better idea to ask to spend either Thanksgiving Day or Christmas morning with your son or daughter when it comes time to create the holiday parenting plan. Ideally, the parenting plan will be created well in advance so that extended family members can include you in some or all of their festivities.

Focus on the events leading up to a holiday

You may be disappointed that you can't spend Christmas Day with your child. However, this doesn't mean that he or she can't come over to decorate the tree on a specific day or bake cookies for Santa before he makes his trip around the world. Furthermore, it's important to note that most kids don't really care when they get to open their presents. Therefore, you shouldn't feel like Christmas is ruined because your son or daughter opened a gift on the 18th or the 28th.

Texas residents who have already experienced child custody issues know that these situations are difficult for everyone involved. The rules regarding child custody proceedings may present additional complications for military families.

In many ways, the procedures for handling family law issues like the creation of a custody agreement and disputing a custody order are the same for military personnel as for civilians. The goal in both situations is to make decisions that represent the best interests of all children involved.

Families that include one or more military parents must also consider the effect that a duty reassignment or deployment may have on their ability to co-parent a child. These changes in job status can happen quickly for military personnel and can include faraway travel. Military parents are aware of their unpredictable job situations and should account for them in any child custody agreement drafted.

When a couple is married and one spouse is the primary earner, that spouse’s Social Security benefits are intended to help fund retirement for both people. A lot of older Texas couples are divorcing closer to their retirement years, but that does not remove Social Security benefits for one spouse. Instead, that spouse might be able to obtain benefits based on the other spouse’s lifetime earnings.

Half benefit available for longtime ex-spouses

When a marriage lasts for at least a decade and ends in divorce, the spouse who earned less among the two already met the first qualifier to obtain benefits. That is at least a decade of marriage prior to divorce. Age is another qualifier. The former spouse seeking benefits and the primary earner each must be at least 62 years of age or otherwise qualified to draw a Social Security benefit. When the ex-spouse seeking a benefit files based on a former spouse’s lifetime earnings, the ex-spouse could get a benefit equal to half the amount of the primary earner.

Disqualifiers prevent benefits claims

Even when a marriage lasted more than 10 years and all other conditions are met for a spousal benefit, a couple things would stop that from happening. One is if the ex-spouse has remarried. If so, the new marriage applies regarding Social Security benefits. If the ex-spouse worked and qualifies for a benefit that is larger could be obtained via the lifetime earnings of a former spouse, then the ex-spouse cannot claim the lower benefit amount.

Like most other states, Texas law allows you to have an active role in your child's life after a divorce. You and your son or daughter's other parent may be allowed to create the terms of a parenting plan that will govern how your child is raised. Working in good faith to create this plan can help to show your son or daughter that meeting his or her needs is your top priority.

Make sure that the plan is reasonable

It is important that you can manage to transport your child to school, to the other parent's house and to extracurricular activities with relative ease. If your child is used to spending time with a babysitter, that person should remain a part of your son or daughter's life. Depending on how old your child is, it may be worthwhile to solicit his or her input when crafting a parenting plan.

Remember that your child's needs outweigh yours

When crafting a custody or visitation plan, you should always remember that your child's needs are more important than what you want. Therefore, you shouldn't insist on a particular arrangement just because it is convenient for you or because you want to win the negotiation. In most cases, your former partner is also making sacrifices for the good of your child whether you recognize them or not.

When couples in Texas decide to get divorced, they are frequently focused on dividing their marital assets equally. To make sure that the property division is equal, divorcing spouses should consider the potential tax consequences. Some assets may be subject to higher taxes, which may make them worth less than taking other assets instead.

Taxes and different types of retirement accounts

Many divorcing couples have retirement accounts that will need to be divided. However, the types of retirement accounts need to be considered when deciding how to divide them. For example, if a couple has both a Roth and a traditional IRA that are equal in account values, choosing to let each spouse keep one might seem to be equal. However, Roth IRAs are funded with post-tax dollars while traditional IRAs are funded with pre-tax dollars. This means that the spouse who takes the Roth IRA will receive the account's full value at the time that distributions are taken while the person receiving the traditional IRA will have to pay taxes on the amounts that are withdrawn.

Child-related credits

Paying attention to child-related credits is also important. While the dependency exemption is currently suspended, it will return by 2026. This exemption allows the claiming parent to take a $4,000 exemption per child to reduce his or her taxable income. Parents should also think about other child-related credits, including the child care credit, the earned income credit and the additional child tax credit. Together, these credits can decrease the amount of taxes that a parent might be forced to pay and increase the amount of his or her income tax refund.

If you are married and considering divorce in Texas, you are not alone. There are several reasons why a marriage can fall apart, and divorce has lost the taboo that it had among older generations. Nearly half of first-time marriages, 42%, end in divorce, and that percentage increases with each subsequent marriage.

What is no-fault divorce?

Several decades ago, states did not allow married couples to get a divorce without a substantial reason, such as adultery or domestic abuse. Though these laws were presumably intended to protect the sanctity of marriage, they resulted in some fabricated stories from individuals stuck in a bad marriage. The rise in divorce rates in recent years is likely due in part to the advent of no-fault divorce, which allows individuals to get a divorce without proving that the other spouse committed a major transgression. Now, you can file for a divorce and simply claim that you and your spouse have irreconcilable differences.

Bad acts leading to divorce

Though you no longer need to allege fault when seeking a divorce, adultery and domestic violence remain common reasons why some spouses want to separate. Adultery may give individuals even more of a reason to separate given the prevalence and growing understanding of STDs.

Your children's ability to thrive after a divorce depends in part on whether you and the other parent are able to successfully co-parent together in Texas, or anywhere else in the country. Starting with the custody agreement and continuing through every communication that you have, both parents will need to put the children's interests first and put their own ego and sensitivities aside.

The custody agreement can help co-parenting

Your co-parenting begins with the custody agreement. It is important to make sure that the custody agreement considers the children's own circumstances as opposed to imposing something on them for the parents' convenience. You will need to decide how to rotate the children between the parents' homes in a way that accommodates their schedules. You should avoid overcommitting to a schedule that you cannot uphold.

The children should be listened to and heard

At the same time, both parents need to make sure that their children's voices are heard. The older the children are, the more input they should have. The children will suffer if one parent speaks ill of the other to them. They benefit the most when the two parents are able to put past differences aside to work together for their good. This means that you should communicate with the other parent respectfully. If that is not possible, your lawyer can recommend various systems through the court that can facilitate more professional communication. Finally, you should be open-minded to review and change the custody agreement if circumstances evolve over time. The children will benefit from your flexibility.

In a worst-case scenario, a divorced parent in Texas may resort to parental alienation to try to get revenge against the other parent. The practice is very destructive and can do long-term damage to the children. As a result, courts will act very strongly when they learn that one parent is engaging in this behavior. It is vital to learn when this is happening and act quickly.

What is parental alienation?

Parental alienation occurs when one parent badmouths the other to the children, feeding them falsehoods meant to destroy their relationship with the other parent. The parent does this because they feel that it is their way of getting back at the other parent for the divorce. The alienating parent is usually an angry individual who has a certain need that the children fulfill with validating that parent's behavior. Thus, you can see how parental alienation actually becomes a symbiotic relationship between the alienator and the children.

How parental alienation is destructive

This loop is destructive in the near-term and can be even more devastating over the long run. Years of therapy may be needed in order to reverse the effects of alienation. As a parent, your relationship with your children may be able to recover, but it will take intensive work. This is why it is vital to act as quickly as possible before deeper damage can be done. A court may even strip the alienating parent of their custodial time with the children or their ability to see them without supervision.

Shared custody arrangements in Texas truly requires that the two parents be able to partner for the good of their children. Co-parenting with someone with whom you may have had an unsuccessful relationship is not always easy. However, putting the past aside and incorporating sound and sensible rules can help you form a lasting and productive relationship that can support shared custody.

Be careful how you talk

In a shared custody situation, your words matter. This encompasses both what you speak about your ex and what you say to him or her. It is critical to never say anything negative about the other parent to or around your children. You must also learn how to communicate respectfully. Even if you were unable to communicate during your relationship with your ex, it is vital to set aside the past and learn how to talk now.

The children come first

Your parenting arrangement must also be focused on the children. First and foremost, everything that you do should be mindful of what is best for them. Since you want to create a childhood that will enable your kids to become well-adjusted adults, make sure that their needs come first. Children need to know that their opinions matter and that they are listened to by both parents. To the extent that any co-parenting arrangement needs to be adjusted, you should periodically reevaluate the plan and make changes as necessary.

When you are getting divorced in Texas, you will exchange financial information with your spouse. The hope is that he or she gives you a full and accurate accounting of his or her assets that are part of the marital estate without hiding or undervaluing property. One Texas billionaire reduced the size of the marital estate by moving assets to trusts domiciled outside of the state. Unfortunately for his wife, this is apparently completely legal.

Billions became only $12 million

The Texas man made billions in the markets by founding his own quantitative trading company. After he engaged in an affair, he divorced his wife by registered mail. When she tried to claim her share of the couple's property, she found out that there was only $12 million even though the couple owned homes, artwork and even a $5 million Egyptian mummy. What happened was the man created several asset trusts in South Dakota. While his wife was originally the beneficiary, he changed that without having to even inform her.

South Dakota is an asset haven

While most means of moving assets will anger a court, the trusts that the man created were legal under South Dakota law. He also formed the trusts before the divorce and moved the property out of his name, making it much more difficult for his wife to recover money. South Dakota has become a home for trusts that are created to protect and shelter money. You can now think of the state as the "Switzerland of the Great Plains."

Texas is a community property state, meaning that just about all assets acquired during marriage are divided 50-50 in a divorce. However, when it comes to determining child custody schedules, the division of time is not so simple. Though many parents nowadays want to split custody 50-50, it can be a challenge to find a schedule that works for everyone, particularly if the parents do not live especially close to one another.

Alternating every other week

Though it may be easier for parents to trade off custody every other week, this is not the best idea for children. If your children are on the younger side, it can be especially traumatic for them to suddenly go one full week without seeing one of their parents, and it may cause them separation anxiety or even an anxiety disorder. A better solution would be to make a schedule where the children do not go more than four days without seeing each of their parents.

The 2-2-3 and the 3-4-4-3 schedules

Since it would be extremely difficult to split one week exactly in half, a lot of people adhere to a 2-2-3 schedule, where parents alternate between having the children for two or three days at a time. A similar schedule is the 3-4-4-3 schedule, where parents alternate between having custody for three or four days. These plans are especially good for younger children, who are preschool or elementary school aged.

If you are a military spouse facing divorce, you are probably experiencing a wide range of emotions.

A military divorce is often more complicated than a divorce in the private sector, and each is unique. Prepare yourself by relying on professional support and understanding all you can about the process.

Explore other avenues

Developing a parenting plan that works for you, your soon-to-be-ex and your children is a major undertaking. You want your voice heard when divorce mediation gets underway.

Be methodical. Organize your thoughts in advance, and set them down on paper so that you are well-prepared when the parenting plan discussion begins.

Understanding the process